I’ve been depressed most of this week, and no matter what headway I made to deal with it the news has been an unending torrent of malicious human misery with severe Nazi deja vu. And now ICE. I need to unplug and hide in a hole. And if everyone wants to go to DC and drag Trump and the GOP out of their offices and throw them in prison I’m good with that.
Forever ago I started a blog post about being on leave from work. I worked on it a little for about a week before it was clear the kids were NOT going to let me spend any time at all dealing with it while they were awake, which frankly proved what I’d written up to that point was mostly lies. So much for chronicling my time off.
This coffee tastes like ass. I guess that expiration date on the bottom does matter. This box is nine months past date, but I also think it’s the only expired coffee in the cabinet. That’s what I’m going to keep telling myself until it’s gone anyway, and then I’ll double check the rest of them. With 2-8oz cups a day I just have to get through four more drinking this caffeinated battery acid. One of the “joys” of not working.
In reality, I’m not working any less, but now it’s all unpaid housework/childcare. However this does mean that all my energy is being poured into this instead of throwing 20-25 hours of SBUX work on top of it. I’m getting no extra rest what with one kid too smart for his own good and determined not to toilet-train, and the other teething, again. But it’s amazing how much a difference having time to keep up with housework makes. Also we actually watched a fucking hockey game. I can’t remember the last time I pulled that off.
I’ve also found I have far more brainpower available to actually problem solve at home. I actually have IDEAS on how to fix frequent problems. This past weekend my dad and I finally designed the access door/panel for the furnace in the attic and built the first “good-enough-for-now” version. I’ll need to reassess how it’s working before I finalize the hardware.
And that’s as far as I got. I’ll note that was not the only box of expired coffee, but it was the only one anywhere near that far gone. It had gotten buried after PAX last year and forgotten until a few days before I started writing this post… four months ago. I don’t think I’ve had coffee more than six weeks past the date on the box since then, and some of them didn’t taste as good fast enough to notice, but certainly no battery acid after that first batch. Since this post, I got the storage units in the attic finished (on the inside anyway), and between those and the access panel/wood I’ve noticed a huge difference in the attic temperature versus the outside. I guess that expensive insulation was worth it.
I used to need time off from work to recharge and just feel better about life, as people do in general. After four months of just having to parent, I think I feel as rested as about one week off from work before the kids would feel. That sucks, but hey it’s more than I’ve had in over three years, so it’s something. And hey, maybe with the backlog cleared I can actually start writing in here again. I’ve got a few different posts I can probably catch up with shortly now that I don’t have those DRAFT files taking up brainpower. But I should’ve been in bed 4 hours ago, which in itself is a story for another time.
I have no idea why this wasn’t posted back when I wrote it years ago, and I need to schedule another of the events that inspired it ASAP.
We’ve reached the time in our lives where we find ourselves going to weddings and baby showers left and right, and begrudgingly admitting “hey, I guess we’re really adults now.” People I’ve known for as much as TWENTY-FIVE years are getting married. It’s a hard thing to wrap your head around, a quarter of a century knowing someone.
Naturally in that time lots of things change. Interests, politics, religion… and while some people you stay friends with through the decades, others fall away. Time has a way of sneaking up on us and a great deal of it can pass since we really knew someone. We go our separate ways intentionally or by circumstance, with a bang or a whimper. And before we know it, years have passed since we last saw someone.
Then I’m reminded that through it all while others have come and gone, there have been constants. Our lives have gone in such different directions and we’ve all left home on different vectors. Different schedules and long-ish drives prevent frequent gatherings, but one thing will always bring us together.
License to Kill, Throwing Knives.
Oh look this one is over two years old. I’m pretty sure this was supposed to become a more scathing criticism of the US health care system in general, considering how long we were paying bills for the fact that Liam was born at all. It’s amusing that in this story Bunny was pregnant and I think we noticed a few days later. Also I wish the kids would sit in the stroller long enough to do this walk with the dog again.
Sunday is the day where Bunny and I are both home from work. It’s a day to buy things we need to survive as well as catch up on things that need to happen around the house. In an attempt to give Bunny some free time to do her own thing, this past Sunday I took Liam and the dog out for a 3-mile walk. It’s a walk I used to do with the dog all the time and rarely if ever have the chance to these days. It was a nice walk and despite Liam’s best attempts we didn’t lose any of his belongings on the excursion. Upon returning home Bunny had accomplished something she’d been trying to do all week, and both kid and dog went down for naps. It was time for a late lunch.
Lunch did not go down so well, which became increasingly apparent over time. After lying down on the couch for hours I tried to go upstairs to use the bathroom. By the time I’d sat down I knew the battle had been lost, and the prisoner that was my lunch was about to make a jailbreak. That was about as fun as it usually is. However at one point there was fairly clear evidence of blood amid the chaos, and it was time to go to the ER to make sure nothing else was wrong.
Three hours and two tests later food poisoning is definitely the culprit and not the stomach flu the hospital is seeing A LOT OF and my brother is apparently coming down with at this same moment. We get anti-nausea meds and go to leave, where I’m asked if I want to pay the copay now or get a bill. Having just the night before made an emergency hardware purchase, I truthfully say I don’t know what’s in my bank account right now and to send me a bill.
I currently have the highest tier medical insurance offered by my employer, and I know last night will cost me $100 for just showing up. Then there will be (at least) two tests, two bags of IV fluid and two IV doses of the anti-nausea med they sent me home with. I expect the bill to be around $500-700. Seriously, fuck health care in this country.
The bill was something like $800. Stupid blood in my vomit from my throat being irritated.
Having trouble sleeping, I figured I’d clean out some drafts. Most of it is half-finished posts long past their relevance and can just be discarded. This one is unfortunately likely to be relevant for quite some time.
Another day, another shooting. Another AR-15 purchased legally by someone who really shouldn’t have been able to legally purchase a firearm. Oh great, this one happens to be a Muslim. Now it’s “terrorism.” Mass shootings are always terrorism, but not in the way the term is used by the media. Homophobia is not remotely an Islamic trait when you look around. Christians are really good at it, especially in this country. Look no further than the pray-away-the-gay initiatives that were only just banned [and sadly aren’t banned everywhere].
Terrorists come in all shapes and sizes and corners of the world. But we like to label Christian terrorists as mentally ill or mad gunmen. We don’t demand white dudes condemn the actions of murderers in their ranks, and we have no business lumping in Muslims with ISIS and Al Qaeda. The phrase “radical Islamic terror” is designed to equate Islam and terrorism worldwide by cowards trying to score political points, as the politics of hate are powerful. After all, that’s how those terrorist organizations tend to get recruits. When it’s worked so well here to divide us, we really shouldn’t be surprised others are using it too. Sure, it’s a time-honored practice, but as long as we continue to demonize and otherize those who disagree with us, nothing is going to change.
Islamaphobia aside, let’s look at the real issue for a damn minute. Mother fucking GUNS. The pillars of our society are the crown, the church, and the gun. There’s something very fucking wrong with that. Guns are so ridiculously American that when I wanted to watch a movie today that didn’t have any guns in it I had very little to choose from. Presidential candidates tweeted pictures of their guns to try and win votes.
The NRA has made it near impossible to get any common sense laws passed. Gun control, like global warming before it, has become a dirty word. Class warfare. There’s a way to make any sensible idea sound like a sign of the apocalypse.
A very long time ago when the laws of the country were first being written, people wanted state militias to exist to keep the government honest. Armed rebellion was literally left on the table, just in case. For the record, the Civil War (regardless of SLAVERY being what they thought was worth doing this over) pretty conclusively proved why this was a bad idea, but let’s stay on track. For the first 75 years our country existed firearms didn’t get terribly more sophisticated. They were good for hunting, and in battle they were deadly, but slow and inaccurate, coming with blades attached to them because you couldn’t possibly hope to reload in close combat.
Today, guns are entirely different beasts. Pistols, semi-automatics, full automatics, and machine guns. All of these would decimate a force using revolutionary weapons [Go ahead and watch season 2 of Westworld for examples]. One person should not have the power to kill hundreds. Now, what are legitimate uses of guns? Self defense? Maybe. Law enforcement? As legit as self defense is at least. Hunting? Definitely. Next, which weapons are appropriate for these uses? Handguns and/or hunting rifles are legit for self defense and hunting. It’s absurd to make anything more powerful available to the common citizen.
What about armed insurrection? Don’t we need to be able to buy what the military uses to defend ourselves, just in case? When is the last time you saw the Defense Department’s budget? We like to boast about being the best at everything, but if our budget is any indication, then we have the greatest military on the planet. And the citizens of the U.S. Would have Zero Chance in an armed conflict against the military.
That’s as far as I got. The odds are another mass shooting happened before I could finish this and I didn’t have the stomach for it. The Onion also really has it covered with it’s “‘No Way to Prevent this’ says Only Nation Where this Regularly Happens”. So that doesn’t leave much to say really, other than gun laws in this country are royally fucked, and our inability to do anything about it is killing us.